How Old Do You Have to Be Before It Gets Weird?…

There are certain behaviors that, after a certain age, seem just weird. Trick-or-treating when you’re 27 is weird. Going on a merry-go-round if you’re 41 and you’re by yourself is weird. Hell, just being 18 and playing in the jungle gym is weird. But for most people, it’s never quite clear exactly when these behaviors start being weird.

The problem with being “too old” for something is that no one ever gives you a cut-off point. It’s just one day you’re totally able to go to Chuck E. Cheese (where a kid can be a hyperactive little monster) judgment-free, and the next it’s more appropriate for you to organize your birthdays at Dave & Busters instead.

There’s always a two-to-three year phase where it gradually becomes less and less acceptable for you do to before it’s just something you don’t do, period. But there’s no exact point where someone goes, “Sorry, you’re now officially too old for that!”

Of course, a lot of this is about personal taste and subjective judgment. For instance, reasonable people might disagree over how many fairy princess movies one middle-aged person can own in their DVD library before they start growing concerned. But let’s face it, there are just some things that you really shouldn’t do when you reach a certain age.

But again, no one can be specific. Trick-or-treating at 13 is great, it’s still technically okay at 16, but by 19 you probably shouldn’t be doing it. Is college the cutoff? Once you get accepted to an institution of higher learning, is that when trick-or-treating officially becomes something we just don’t do anymore? No one ever says!

Because if we ever had exact dates for when we could no longer do something we enjoy, that would remind us to savor it more and take full advantage of it before it’s gone.

[Editor’s note: All of the above excludes Disney World. The day you’re too old for Disney World is the day you lose your soul.]


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